Letters

Letters 07-28-14

Worry About Legals

I can’t figure out what perplexes me more, the misinformation everywhere in the media or those who believe it to be true. Take the Hobby Lobby case; as a company that is primarily owned by a religious family, they felt their First Amendment rights were infringed upon by the “Affordable” Care Act...

Stop Labeling and Enjoy

I have been struggling to find a simple way of understanding for myself the concepts of conservative, liberal, and moderation as it relates to our social interactions with each other...

Proposal One & The Public Good

Are you kidding me? Another corporate giveaway with loopholes for large corporations who rule us? Hasn’t our corrupt and worthless governor done enough to raise taxes, provide corporate welfare, unjustly tax pensions, and shut down elected officials with his emergency manager racket...

The Truth About Road Workers

Apparently Mr. Kachadurian did not catch on to the fact that the MDOT Employee Memorial in Clare is a tribute to highway workers who lost their lives building our transportation systems. It was paid for by current and former MDOT employees who likely knew some of these people personally...

Idiotic and Misguided

As a seasonal resident, I always look forward to reading your paper, if only because of the idiotic letters to the editor and off the wall columns...


Home · Articles · News · Random Thoughts · Fox wanted: Must be...
. . . .

Fox wanted: Must be willing to relocate

Robert Downes - June 6th, 2011
Fox wanted: must be willing to relocate
Saw a huge fox trotting alongside Crystal Lake in Benzie County a
week ago. At first I thought it was a German Shepherd because it
looked to be about four feet long from nose to tail; but drawing
closer, its low stature and rust-red fur revealed it to be a vulpes
vulpes, or red fox, for those of you who no longer speak‘a da Latin.
Anyway, this proud fox was trotting along unconcernedly by the side of
the road with a fresh baby bunny in its jaws, probably heading home to
its den to feed the kits.
Oh how I would love to borrow that fox for a weekend at the Downes
household where we are in the midst of a chipmunk and squirrel
population explosion.
Our neighborhood seems to have more squirrels than Borneo has monkeys,
and they spend most of their time digging up my wife’s tulips, playing
hell with her garden, and gobbling at the bird feeders. Speaking of
which, we are fortunate to have a small flock of cardinals who like to
nest in the neighbors’ evergreens, and last night I saw a nasty black
squirrel trying to sneak up on one of them as it was drying off from a
thunderstorm.
Then there are the chipmunks, who’ve begun a reign of terror in our
garage this spring, nibbling on the stores of bird food. I practically
trip over them each day and they’re cocky too, lingering when you head
in their direction with an I-double-dare-ya -to-stop-me attitude.
So this is a problem for you too? Going online, I checked for
predators of chipmunks and squirrels and came up with this: “Swooping
hawks, raccoons, opossums, wildcats, coyotes, foxes, large snakes,
owls, eagles.”
We have an occasional possum passing through our backyard, and a family
of raccoons lives in the storm sewer, but wildcats, coyotes, large
snakes, owls, “swooping“ hawks and eagles seem to be in short supply in
residential Traverse City. As for our cat (nicknamed “Fat Cat”), she
lays out the occasional mouse, but isn’t much of a threat when it comes
to chipmunks and squirrels. More likely, I‘d fear they‘d carry Fat Cat
off to an evil end if their squirrelly little brains ever decided to
gang up on her.
So a Fantastic Mr. Fox would be a nice addition to our backyard
menagerie to keep the varmints at bay.
I wonder how many other city dwellers suffer from this plague of
rodents? I’ve thought of buying a sling shot and a bag of paint balls,
but that seems likely to produce holes in the neighbors’ windows. I‘ve
also considered live-trapping, but carting varmints out to new homes in
the country -- one tree rat at a time -- sounds like a hassle. Better
to just live-trap that big Benzie fox and give him an all-expenses-paid
vacation in our backyard in return for services rendered.
In the meantime, if anyone has a swooping hawk available, please let me
know.
 
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