You wanna come over and see my hairless hamster? I found myself asking this of people, weirdly, but in all innocence and unaware of the not-so-subtle subtext. Even my response when theyd demure, Hes really cool, seems bizarre in retrospect.
Truth is Ive got one, and not only hairless but albino also. A little pink guy with red eyes. Hes a rescue hamster. I found him quivering on the grass, in a corner of the foundation of my old apartment building on Lake Ave. in Traverse City. Hot summer day, in bright sunlight, with a large bee hovering above his papery pink back. His head was tucked in. He was hiding.
My inclination was to scoop him up, but then I thought that he might be a bitey little fellow, or that he might panic and take off. My only other experience with a rodent had been a pet rat named Roadkill, who had lived mostly in the pocket of my MC jacket and later died in an apartment fire. Roadkill had never bitten me, but still, this guy was an unknown so I went inside and grabbed a shoebox to scoop him into.
Back inside with the guy, I looked around for something to put him in temporarily. Something tall enough so he couldnt get out, and made of something non-chewable. I was in the process of moving and had a large hideous gold trunk Id bought at the Salvation Army. It was perfect, so I placed him inside and headed upstairs.
I knew this abandoned critter had something to do with my neighbor; hed had a hairless hamster for sometime. Id only really looked at it once and had been mildly grossed out. To me it looked like a ball of flesh with a face stuck on it, and claws.